the good life
You say you take me into consideration, but never change anything.
You say it’s important to sacrifice, but make it a double standard.
I’m too much of a bitch, I get too pissy and too stubborn.
I’m too negative, too young, and too immature.
Maybe the age gap is too much, and we are just at too big of a difference in our lives.
Maybe you don’t want to try because you know you’d be happier with someone else, because you clearly aren’t happy anymore with me.
We can’t hold a conversation without getting into a fight.
I can only speak for myself, but I love you
I love you so fucking much and all I want is for us to make this work
yet nothing happens.
This stand still is tearing me apart. We take one step forward, and I take a tumble backwards.
We never seem to know why.
We’re just too different? We’re just that far gone in the relationship? We’re just past the point where things can get better?
Are you giving up? Is the physical distance too much?
I don’t know because I’m not in your head, but I told you that I’m willing to believe everything you tell me even if I only get hurt in the end. I’m willing to try doing whatever it may possibly take, and I’m willing to do that not knowing what any of those things may be.
For a fleeting moment in comparison to everything else, we were making each other happy today. I can’t help but hold on to those times. Six fucking straight days I spent with you last month and all of them were blissful. I was happy. I was happier than I have been in such a long time, and everything was mutual. I’ve known you for three years and wanted to be with you the entire time; you’ve felt the same. Doesn’t that mean enough? Shouldn’t it? We finally have that and now we’re going to fuck it all up?
I’m not okay with that.
I guess I’m too hopeful.
But I hope that I’m not.
ps- this entire fucking album is the depiction of us right now and it’s making me sick to my stomach
