January 2011
5 posts
things i dislike:
crying myself to sleep minus the sleep part so basically just crying endlessly until it’s the next day, then morning. and I am left toss turned in blankets, weak and alone wondering how the days so tacitly turn into another, fighting off a chill and the taste of choked sobs while somehow finding the hope buried deep in my lungs to take a breath in and to exhale- pull the sheets...
Jan 20th
dear mrl,
Are you either of the following: dead or injured beyond capability of using any kind of communication device? No? You are not? Ah, then you are possibly the most heartless soul I’ve ever met. I sincerely regret wasting even more of my time trying to know you as anything different, and spending a month straight traveling two hours out of my way, four times a week, to take care of your cat...
Jan 18th
the nightmares are back.worse than before.
Sometimes in the morning I am petrified and can’t move Awake but cannot open my eyes And the weight is crushing down on my lungs I know I can’t breathe And I hope someone will save me this time And your mother’s still calling you, insane and high Swearing it’s different this time And you tell her you give in to the demons that possess her And that God never...
Jan 11th
testify
even now, with it all over, there is still a part of me that feels like I’ll never make it through today “I am going to show you a photograph now, Jessica. Okay?” I nodded. I think I nodded. As she walked over my shaking got worse. No one had said anything about photographs. “Do you recognize the person in this photo?” It was my mother. Yes, I do. Maybe I was saying...
Jan 7th
all smiling and swollen
I’m not sure what I have gotten myself into with all of this winter is just so cold, I keep telling myself and anyway i have enough love for now
Jan 4th